Grief Is for People

Content Warning: This section of the guide includes discussion of death by suicide and mental illness.

Crosley passes the restaurant where she last saw Russell frequently. She begins a ritual of sitting across the street from the restaurant at night, studying the table where they sat through the window and having imaginary conversations with Russell. She dreams of him most nights—she dreads them but also longs for them because in the dreams, she gets to have conversations with him about his death.

Crosley has not spoken to Russell’s partner since their meeting in Connecticut. She does not know what has become of Russell’s ashes or what his partner plans to do with them. She does not want to bother his partner, knowing that his grief is enormous.

As the end of September arrives, Crosley is mired in her grief. She believes that not focusing her thoughts on Russell at all times is a betrayal to him. When she notices that her pulse often seems to be racing, she visits a cardiologist, who says that Crosley is experiencing panic attacks.

Unexpectedly, Crosley receives an email about her stolen jewelry from an audience member from a book reading that she gave, during which she spoke of the theft.